Who has two thumbs and is now 27? Etienne Marcel Pourtout, I thought we met!

This will be the first and last post that I feature a picture of only me, but hey, its my birthday, so why not.

Also, my mother always taught me to always wear a tie on photo IDs and smile. So that cheesy smile you see, that’s for the mother. I do look extra happy in that picture. Good stuff.

First, I feel blessed to have made it this far. I thank the parents, Barbara and even the original Marcel, my dad for raising me.

OK, Kenisha told me about my passive-aggressive nature and that last statement sounded like that. I thank both of my parents equally for raising me.

I feel happiness that my family has been able to see me have successes in my life even though I feel like I have so much more to accomplish. I’ve always been fortunate to have the unconditional support of my family and not everyone has that.

I’m grateful to my brothers, Troy and Denny, my sister, Aline, who I’m trying to get to know better, and my sister-in-law only in term, Angie. She’s been my big sister since she married my brother and none of that in-law crap. Each of them has been a tremendous influence and I’m grateful that they’re in my life.

I’m also grateful for my countless cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews that have been amazing to me. If any of you are reading this, thanks for everything.

I have so many friends here in Nashville from Belmont to Vandy and everywhere in between. I’m happy that I’ve been able to find a place of happiness at Belmont. I don’t think my co-workers or people in my Belmont family realize how much I was struggling with stuff in my life before I came back to Nashville in August. But through their acceptance of me, I’m in a better place.

I still have my friends in Charleston, Atlanta and the NYC. I’m happy to have lived in all of these places and met great people along the way.

I’m happy to work in sports. I get paid to watch games and work with athletes, can’t complain about that.

I’m happy to have good health. I’ve woken up every day for 27 years and can walk and talk and be fully functional by myself. That’s not guaranteed in any of our lives.

This has been one of my harder posts to write because I’m focusing exclusively on myself. Yes, every other post I’ve written has included me in it, but I feel that when I’m telling each of you about events in my life, I’m telling you stories. Everything I write here is completely true, because I just have to keep it honest with you if I’m going to keep it honest with myself.

Usually, when my birthday approaches, Mr. Grumpy emerges and makes me seem miserable to others around me. Some may think that I’m unhappy that my birthday is approaching and honestly, there were some years that I was. The reason that I was is that I compared myself with the traditional rites of passage that each age represents.

From birthdays three through 18, I was expecting a traditional birthday party with balloons, friends, family and some awesome cake. Scratch that, pie and sweet punch, sweet, sweet punch. However, I never had a birthday party.

When I turned 21, I was expecting to have had a girlfriend by then and a car, but I ended up spending the day alone at my brother’s house with no friends. When I turned 25, I was expecting to be married, celebrating the day with a wife, friends and family, but I was alone once again.

What I’ve realized is that I can’t compare my life to others. I have to live my own life. If I judged myself against some of my friends, I’m a failure. While people are starting families, buying homes and have traditional jobs with security, I’m where I’m at now. I’m a 27-year old graduate student actually taking on more debt, live on an air mattress (which is very comfortable by the way), and literally live check to check, work long, isolated hours for not much money and live hours away from the nearest family member. But I’m happy.

I’m happy to go to a place where I like working. I’m happy to be involved in sports. I’m happy to be in a city like Nashville. I’m happy to have friends like each of you.

I’m happy to the Tennessee Tornado, Josh, BK, Meggie, Sean, Gerard, Jared, Liz, George D., Sarah T., Joel, Erica C., Bari and many others for reading this blog consistently. I also have to thank Kenisha for encouraging me to start this blog from my initial ‘Pancakes’ e-mails.

Another thing that a birthday makes me do is reflect on the many good times of my life, but the biggest thing that I have to be happy for is that I was raised in a Christian household because it has been the basis for the guy that each of you know now.

I can be a better Christian just like I can be a better employee, a better physical being, a better writer. However, growing up the way that I did made me humble and content with seeking internal happiness.

There have been low moments in my life for sure, but the ones that I look back on now and are grateful that they happened. Like when I applied to law schools for three straight years and didn’t get accepted to any one of them. Or taking the LSAT three times and not improving my score. Or almost getting kicked out of Vandy after first semester of freshman year for grades. Or barely graduating college in general. Or graduating college and not having a job and having to take an unpaid internship at a magazine. Or at times not having a girlfriend all of these years.

All of those events made me realize what I wanted and needed in my life. It has taught me to be grateful to have my needs filled and to have the ability to seek my wants.

Needs and wants is what it comes down to. My needs like a home, a job, health are all filled. My wants like a nice car, girlfriends, money will all come if I stay on a positive path.

If I had no struggles in my life, I wouldn’t be the determined person that I am today. The worst people to me are the ones that act cocky, are full of themselves and are constantly reminding you of what they’ve done to try to impress you.

I believe in internal confidence and being content with yourself. I also believe in being nice and in karma. If you act like an ass to others, it will come back to you.

Sorry that I’ve started rambling but I’ll end it with this.

My main reason for living is to bring positivism to each of you and to the world in general. I don’t want to disappoint my family with my actions. I want to be a good son, a good brother, a good uncle, a good cousin, a good nephew, a good friend. I want to be a good person for my friends to talk to and interact with, I want to be a good family member. Funny thing is that all of those wants are needs as well.

The main reason that I write this blog is two-folded. I feel that I need to write this blog for my personal growth as a man. Some of my stories and events that I write about may seem lame. You may not like my NBA articles, why I don’t trust animals or why I’m so worried about the women I interact with. However, each of those events makes me reflect on myself and makes me work on being a better person.

The second reason is that I want you to read my posts and maybe relate it to something in your life and help you become a better person. Maybe you read one of my posts and it reminds you of a positive or negative time of your life and it can make you work on being a better person. That’s the goal because we don’t have as much time on this earth as we think.

I’m 27, but honestly, I really only expect to have about 25-30 more years in my life. I know people are living longer and things like that and that’s great. However, I’m reaching the midpoint of my life and I realize this. This doesn’t mean that I should stop living. I just know that this can all end tomorrow.

So if you’re reading this post, first thanks for making it this far. But more importantly, take stock of your life. Are you where you want to be? Do you have your needs and wants in order? Have you been a good person and been a positive force in someone’s life? If the answer to any of these are no, that’s OK. In fact, its more than OK, its normal.

I’m not perfect, far from it. I don’t deserve everything that I’ve gotten, both good and bad in my life. But we’re dealt the cards of life and we have to accept it. And as I celebrate this glorious day, I like my hand and putting my chips all in for the rest of my life.