Since I did a post about what I would possibly look for in a woman that I’m dating, here are the things/type of girls that I would prefer not to date…even though I’m pretty down with whatever.
1) Coworker. It’s not illegal even though I guess in some jobs it can be. I just don’t want my worlds colliding. I got that from Seinfeld when George’s fiancée Susan became friends with Elaine. His two social circles crossed and that caused him problems.
Have I been attracted to a co-worker? Of course and I’m sure there was a time that one or twenty were attracted to me at one point but that line can’t be crossed. What if you hit it off with your co-worker and then you break up? Do you really want to see your ex every day at your job? Furthermore, if it was a bad breakup, charges like sexual harassment and terrible things like that can go down. Not a good look.
Exception: I guess if you’re in the adult film industry this wouldn’t be a problem. Also, you have to define a coworker. I have my steady job but I volunteer/freelance work at some other places at times. I won’t mess with the steady job but the other employment places are a possibility. If you’re younger and have a summer internship or something like that, date away, live the life.
2) Neighbor: Same thing as a coworker, accept possibly worse. You can’t crap where you eat. If things got very bad with your co-worker, you could change jobs. Sure it would suck, but it can be done. If you break up with your neighbor, it would be much tougher to find another place to live.
Exception: I live in a home with neighbors that I cross often. However, if you’re in an apartment complex and say you live on the third floor and the ex is on the 10th floor that can be manageable. Also, if you’re visiting somewhere for the summer and going to your permanent residence in the fall, that’s cool to hook up with a neighbor.
3) Sibling of good friend: This one needs some explaining. First, I blame Friends for making this crap kosher to many people. In real life, there is no way that Chandler and Monica should have dated or even married if Ross wasn’t such a pussy and let that go down. Can’t happen.
If you started to date someone and over time you became good friends with the sibling of your partner, that’s fine. However, if the reverse happened, for me it would be dating one of my buddy’s sisters, that’s a recipe for disaster.
First, your buddy will know about your dating past even if it is positive and this is bad. If your past is solid, he will expect the same from you. If your past was bad, you are going to be held to an unfair standard. Second, your buddy will always choose his sister if the battle comes between you and your girlfriend. The buddy may acknowledge that his sister has her moments and may be wrong a time or two, but in the end, he’s going to stick with his blood which he really should do anyway. Third, your buddy is going to be feeding information to his sister about you, even if its unintentional.
Finally, when the breakup happens and trust me, it will happen, how awkward is that situation. No one wants to be involved with that situation.
4) Ex partner of a good friend: I blame Friends for this shit as well. Remember when Joey started dating Rachel after Ross did? WTF? Wow, Ross really was a loser. Wasn’t Ross the father of Rachel’s baby or was it Joey and didn’t Joey date Rachel while she was pregnant or something like that? I stopped watching the show towards the end but that is so uncool, that whole scenario.
First, when your buddy is dating someone, you care supposed to be the objective arbiter of the whole relationship. Your job is to support your buddy and give him votes of confidence when he’s doing the right thing and call him out when he isn’t doing right. You can tell your buddy that his girlfriend is acting mean right now but remind him to listen to her once in a while and treat her well, stuff like that.
How can you do that when deep down you’re trying to hit that for yourself?
How I Met Your Mother is doing this crap as well and I don’t appreciate it.
Furthermore, talk about awkward, when all parties involved are at the same location for the same event, that can’t be comfortable.
Have I been attracted to a sister/cousin/aunt/granddaughter of a good friend in the past? Of course, but I tried my best to not go there if possible.
Exceptions: This one is so tricky; I don’t think that there really is one. If you decide to go this route, you had better be on your best behavior because when the breakup happens, you will lose a partner and good friend.
5) Student-athlete: For me, it’s the student-athlete. For the rest of you, who are in a supervisory position, don’t date someone who you look over. That’s not a good situation and even worse than the co-worker mention earlier.
There are some serious legal ramifications with this one and that’s no joke. You break up and it ends badly, you can be served with some papers that you want no part of. Also, you will probably be blamed because you are the supervisor and the more senior member of the situation so you will bear the burden of the blame, even if it wasn’t your fault.
Now, its not technically illegal for me to be involved with a student/athlete or someone that I may supervise like a student worker or intern, but it would be a bad, bad move for several reasons. The student/athlete one is probably the most official unwritten rule in college athletics and it probably is not acceptable on some level legally so just walk away.
The student worker or intern situation isn’t as cut and dry, just be careful.
Have I been attracted to a student-athlete or a student-worker in my career? You know I’m too smart to address this one specifically.
Exceptions: This one is easy. When you get a new job, everyone at your old place are fair game.
6) Everyone who isn’t between the ages of 22-37: My age range is to date someone who is five years younger than me to ten years older. People tell me that I should reverse it, but if I did that, I would be looking to date 17-year olds which is disgusting. Maybe when I reach 35, I can switch it up, but for now, this is my range.
Exceptions: If I cross paths with a 21-year old who I find interesting, I’ll talk to her. Actually this happened a few weeks ago with Donna, read here: http://pourtoutpancakes.blogspot.com/2008/09/general-thoughts-on-thursday-night.html
She’s cool and everything but I have to be careful because it messes with my retirement from pursuing women aggressively she is very, very cute, sweet and I think potentially attracted to me (it’s the beard, I know) , I’m heeding my own advise and letting it happen naturally.
Who are on your no-date list? I would be interested in knowing. Until then, remember to love the Jesus and he will love you too. Here’s some Underworld with River of Bass, a chill tune I like:
1) Coworker. It’s not illegal even though I guess in some jobs it can be. I just don’t want my worlds colliding. I got that from Seinfeld when George’s fiancée Susan became friends with Elaine. His two social circles crossed and that caused him problems.
Have I been attracted to a co-worker? Of course and I’m sure there was a time that one or twenty were attracted to me at one point but that line can’t be crossed. What if you hit it off with your co-worker and then you break up? Do you really want to see your ex every day at your job? Furthermore, if it was a bad breakup, charges like sexual harassment and terrible things like that can go down. Not a good look.
Exception: I guess if you’re in the adult film industry this wouldn’t be a problem. Also, you have to define a coworker. I have my steady job but I volunteer/freelance work at some other places at times. I won’t mess with the steady job but the other employment places are a possibility. If you’re younger and have a summer internship or something like that, date away, live the life.
2) Neighbor: Same thing as a coworker, accept possibly worse. You can’t crap where you eat. If things got very bad with your co-worker, you could change jobs. Sure it would suck, but it can be done. If you break up with your neighbor, it would be much tougher to find another place to live.
Exception: I live in a home with neighbors that I cross often. However, if you’re in an apartment complex and say you live on the third floor and the ex is on the 10th floor that can be manageable. Also, if you’re visiting somewhere for the summer and going to your permanent residence in the fall, that’s cool to hook up with a neighbor.
3) Sibling of good friend: This one needs some explaining. First, I blame Friends for making this crap kosher to many people. In real life, there is no way that Chandler and Monica should have dated or even married if Ross wasn’t such a pussy and let that go down. Can’t happen.
If you started to date someone and over time you became good friends with the sibling of your partner, that’s fine. However, if the reverse happened, for me it would be dating one of my buddy’s sisters, that’s a recipe for disaster.
First, your buddy will know about your dating past even if it is positive and this is bad. If your past is solid, he will expect the same from you. If your past was bad, you are going to be held to an unfair standard. Second, your buddy will always choose his sister if the battle comes between you and your girlfriend. The buddy may acknowledge that his sister has her moments and may be wrong a time or two, but in the end, he’s going to stick with his blood which he really should do anyway. Third, your buddy is going to be feeding information to his sister about you, even if its unintentional.
Finally, when the breakup happens and trust me, it will happen, how awkward is that situation. No one wants to be involved with that situation.
4) Ex partner of a good friend: I blame Friends for this shit as well. Remember when Joey started dating Rachel after Ross did? WTF? Wow, Ross really was a loser. Wasn’t Ross the father of Rachel’s baby or was it Joey and didn’t Joey date Rachel while she was pregnant or something like that? I stopped watching the show towards the end but that is so uncool, that whole scenario.
First, when your buddy is dating someone, you care supposed to be the objective arbiter of the whole relationship. Your job is to support your buddy and give him votes of confidence when he’s doing the right thing and call him out when he isn’t doing right. You can tell your buddy that his girlfriend is acting mean right now but remind him to listen to her once in a while and treat her well, stuff like that.
How can you do that when deep down you’re trying to hit that for yourself?
How I Met Your Mother is doing this crap as well and I don’t appreciate it.
Furthermore, talk about awkward, when all parties involved are at the same location for the same event, that can’t be comfortable.
Have I been attracted to a sister/cousin/aunt/granddaughter of a good friend in the past? Of course, but I tried my best to not go there if possible.
Exceptions: This one is so tricky; I don’t think that there really is one. If you decide to go this route, you had better be on your best behavior because when the breakup happens, you will lose a partner and good friend.
5) Student-athlete: For me, it’s the student-athlete. For the rest of you, who are in a supervisory position, don’t date someone who you look over. That’s not a good situation and even worse than the co-worker mention earlier.
There are some serious legal ramifications with this one and that’s no joke. You break up and it ends badly, you can be served with some papers that you want no part of. Also, you will probably be blamed because you are the supervisor and the more senior member of the situation so you will bear the burden of the blame, even if it wasn’t your fault.
Now, its not technically illegal for me to be involved with a student/athlete or someone that I may supervise like a student worker or intern, but it would be a bad, bad move for several reasons. The student/athlete one is probably the most official unwritten rule in college athletics and it probably is not acceptable on some level legally so just walk away.
The student worker or intern situation isn’t as cut and dry, just be careful.
Have I been attracted to a student-athlete or a student-worker in my career? You know I’m too smart to address this one specifically.
Exceptions: This one is easy. When you get a new job, everyone at your old place are fair game.
6) Everyone who isn’t between the ages of 22-37: My age range is to date someone who is five years younger than me to ten years older. People tell me that I should reverse it, but if I did that, I would be looking to date 17-year olds which is disgusting. Maybe when I reach 35, I can switch it up, but for now, this is my range.
Exceptions: If I cross paths with a 21-year old who I find interesting, I’ll talk to her. Actually this happened a few weeks ago with Donna, read here: http://pourtoutpancakes.blogspot.com/2008/09/general-thoughts-on-thursday-night.html
She’s cool and everything but I have to be careful because it messes with my retirement from pursuing women aggressively she is very, very cute, sweet and I think potentially attracted to me (it’s the beard, I know) , I’m heeding my own advise and letting it happen naturally.
Who are on your no-date list? I would be interested in knowing. Until then, remember to love the Jesus and he will love you too. Here’s some Underworld with River of Bass, a chill tune I like:
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