...So Erin Andrews covered a baseball game for ESPN one day...

I’ve wanted to write about Erin Andrews for a long time but just never had the desire to until now.

For those of you unfamiliar with Andrews, she is a reporter for ESPN. She covers events as a sideline reporter and interviewer. Her profile has risen the past few years and has become a household name within the sports television world.

She’s considered attractive, talented and actually does a decent job in my opinion. From a strictly looks prospective, she’s cute but not to the level that some guys are talking about. If I saw her on the street in Nashville, I would say, “OK, she’s cute.”

I really don’t have usage for sideline reporters, which I’ll get into later. So, for what she’s told to do, she’s competent.

She also has a good prospective on what she does, her role in sports, is blog-friendly (which is a positive in my book obviously) and a lot of other positives.

However, since Andrews has such a high profile position on ESPN, the backlash is starting to happen.

She recently covered a Cubs/Brewers game on ESPN and her wardrobe and general professionalism was called into question by Mike Nadel, a Chicago news service columnist. Here’s his post, which I suggest at least glancing at before reading my opinion of it: http://www.norwichbulletin.com/sports/columnists/x1370764220/Mike-Nadel-Blonde-bombshell-cant-distract-red-hot-Cubs

Of course this got some responses. First, here’s a relatively objective male prospective from Deadspin: http://deadspin.com/5031564/the-erin-andrews-backlash-has-officially-begun

I mostly agreed with the Deadspin article, however, I wanted to get a woman’s prospective. I usually look at things from a male prospective first because I'm a dude and I can't avoid it. Then as a minority such as an Eskimo (who never get the respect they deserve), someone from Panama or a black person, whichever one I feel like first. And then maybe from a woman's prospective. I have the male and minority thing down but sometimes find it difficult with women. So I came across this article: http://onmilwaukee.com/sports/articles/andrewsreact.html

Finally, I then talked with another woman who’s a sports follower, my good friend Joan for her view on the situation.

She told me that first, she finds sideline reporters useless, which I disagree with somewhat. The only times that the reporters are useful are in two situations. First, if someone blows out a knee or something and they aren’t coming back in the game, that’s kinda important. Second, if they’re crappy like Emmitt Smith, OJ Simpson or Eric Dickerson. That unintentional comedy is very joyful to see.

BTW, what is up with Black Hall of Fame running backs being bad in this position? If we see Barry Sanders or Tony Dorsett on the sidelines, I’ll be scared.

Joan then told me that she agreed with the Milwaukee reported I linked to earlier. She said that good looking women tend to be ignorant to the fact that their looks helped them get into that position. She was also fair to point out that there’s nothing wrong with that, which I agree with. People get positions because of looks, race, age and a lot of other things like that. Society, especially employment, isn’t fair.

Joan then said that women in the sporting industry have to be great at their job to earn respect. I do agree with that. I can also say the same for minorities and people of certain ages and looks. However, that’s really a commentary of television in general.

People use the joke that you have a face for radio, but that’s true. You can’t move away from the fact that Andrews’ attractiveness helps her career.

Joan then proceeded to tell me this, and I’ll quote her:

“I also think that if you're just good at your job, you shouldn't have to flirt or wear inappropriate clothes (and yes, she {Andrews} does wear inappropriate clothes). The other part of being a woman in the sports industry means that you have to carefully walk a thin line: you can't be a bitch, but you also can't be a smiling, weak, yes-(wo)man, or you'll get walked over. You have to know how to stand up for yourself and how to voice opinions and disagree with people, but you have to be able to do it tactfully, diplomatically and respectfully or you'll never get people to work with you, or respect you.”

Joan then talked about the dress being inappropriate for the workplace, which in this case is a baseball field. Interesting insight into the issue indeed.

OK, so I’ve heard every opinion possible (accept from an Eskimo. If one of you knows an Eskimo, I would ask him or her as well).

Here’s my prospective of it, in bullet-point style:

• Andrews can’t help that she’s attractive. That’s my first thought. Along with that, if she wears a dress and looks well, is that her fault? It’s not like she’s wearing lingerie out there.

It’s the middle of the frickin summer and its baseball. Her dress wasn’t inappropriate at all. “Playing the sexpot?” I don’t get that at all.

But, once again, I’m a guy on this issue.

• If she’s taking advantage of her looks, good for her. People act like only women do this. Why do you think you don’t see ugly men on things such as early morning shows like Good Morning America and Today, soap operas and other “female-focused” shows?

The majority of men who watch ESPN like attractive women and the network knows this.

• She’s does interviews/sideline reporting. Personally, I can do without it because I really don’t find it interesting. If Andrews and other sideline reporters left TV, I wouldn’t really care. However, for what she does, Andrews does a good job. Why do some people really care about this? She’s there to provide some fun stuff. If she’s friendly with the players before the game, that’s probably a good thing. The players will be more open with her and we can learn more about their hobbies or how many cars they own, you know, tangible information like that.

• These are men. There have been hundreds of times when I’ve been hanging out with my friends and a cute girl walks by and we say that she’s cute or give an extra look. It is what it is. So what if the Cubs players were giving each other the general nod of approval guys give to each other. It happens. As long as they weren’t disrespectful towards her, let it be.

To be fair, here’s an interview that Nadal did with Deadspin defending his side of the story: http://deadspin.com/5031910/mike-nadel-got-your-e+mail-and-is-actually-quite-a-reasonable-fellow

Furthermore, here’s Andrews’ response to all of this stuff. http://ww3.startribune.com/blogs/randball/2008/08/02/erin-andrews-my-overall-reaction-is-that-its-really-sad/

I think in the end that Nadal and others are feeling some form of envy towards Andrews. She has become a major commodity. If she sucked at her job and was just getting by on her looks, then I can understand the dislike towards her.

However, she and many other female journalists like Suzy Kolber, Andrea Kramer, Pam Oliver, Bonnie Bernstein, Michelle Tafoya, Hannah Storm, Leslie Visser and a whole bunch of others do a good job at what they do. I really don’t care how they look. I’m watching the game more than anything.

If anything the crappiness of overall sports broadcasting announcers currently should be a bigger issue.

If Nadal thinks that there are some unattractive women out there who aren’t getting sports broadcasting positions because of Andrews, that’s probably true, but tough luck. While sports are a business, it’s also entertainment. The entertainment world works like this.

Finally, its frickin sports! Just relax.

This isn’t like Anderson Cooper interviewing President Bush on the Iraq War or something like that. Its sports.

I would love to hear your opinions on this topic. If you agree with me, cool. If you don’t agree with me, I would love to hear that side as well. And if you’re that minority that I’ve mentioned throughout this post, you will get premium coverage in my post in response to this post, because you know that’s coming.

For now, here’s Michael Scott’s prospective of women in the workplace. If you follow his lead, I guarantee a firing from your job and possibly a sexual harassment suit. Good times! Because you deserved it.

If marriage is like this, why get married? (Football edition)

I came across this article a few days ago and I’ve wanted to address the topic before and this is a good opportunity to.

The article was on Deadspin, which should tell you immediately that it shouldn’t be taken seriously. I recommend taking a look at it before you read my thoughts on it. Here’s a link: http://deadspin.com/5025638/your-nfl-season-brownie-point-calculator

OK, hopefully by now you’ve at least skimmed it. The basics are that this guy feels compelled to make a list of items that he can do for his wife to watch football games in the fall.

I’m going to list each of the items that can be done for the wife and give my thoughts.

First, I have several things to say. I’m single and never had a serious girlfriend. I’ve also don’t have any children. My opinions may be limited to this scope, but it’s the prospective that I have.

Second, in general, if your wife is giving you crap for watching a football game, seriously reevaluate that situation. If you can’t take a few hours to watch your favorite team play a ball game without getting crap from your significant other, that’s a shame on you moment.

OK, here are the tasks:

1) Stealing Gossip Magazines from the gym or doctor’s office: This wouldn’t be an issue because I read that stuff all the time. Yeah, make fun of me for caring about stuff going on in the Hills or Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. It’s a guilty pleasure. I’ll still read Sports Illustrated but throw in a People magazine in there as well. No problems here.

In relation to this, get your girlfriend stuff she likes once in a while. While you’re picking up that case of beer or getting those nachos, get some stuff she needs, even the unfun female hygene items, if you know what I’m saying. Don’t be selfish.

2) Take the kids out for a full morning/afternoon by yourself: First, IT’S YOUR FRICKIN KID! For someone who grew up with a single mother, it’s a shame that spending time with your kid can get you brownie points.

Kids are a pain in the ass at time, I know, but its your family. I personally enjoy spending time with my nieces and nephews, taking them to games, going shopping, stuff like that. I like shopping at A&F or Claires with my niece. Don’t hate.

BTW, a good way to pick up women is to have a little kid with you. They’re better than dogs! If you don’t have a wedding ring on, most women will know that you’re not married. Even if they think its your kid, most women are fine with dating a single parent so that shouldn’t scare them off. If you interact with the kid well, it shows your nurturing side, but it has to be natural because women can see through an act.

3) Doing some random chore without her having to ask: Clean up after yourself, wow that sounds like such a challenge!

4) Watching her favorite tv show/movie with her: Ladies, here’s something you may or may not know. That TV show/movie that your significant other complains about not liking, he may actually like it! Don’t let him fool you into thinking that he completely despises watching Project Runway or Grey’s Anatomy or America’s Next Top Model or whatever female-driven show is out there.

I can watch any show or movie, find the hot chick in it and be content. Most guys can do the same.

Anyway, spend time with your lady. As cool as it is to stay up till 1 AM playing video games or watching my soap operas and court room shows, any girl that wants to watch anything with me is fine in my book, whatever it is. Besides, she’s probably put up with watching Sportscenter and stuff she’s not interested in. Balance.

5) Doing Taxes: Do them together, you have to check your money. DTA, kids. Don’t trust anyone, wife, girlfriend, baby mama, none of them.

6) Planning some sort of special dinner, birthday party or brunch: If it involves food, I’m down with planning it. This shouldn’t be a problem at all.

7) Conceiving and completing some sort of godforsaken house project: I have many skills but housework isn’t one of them. If you want me to build you a deck or make a counter, that’s not going to happen.

However, I know my limits. As I learned from my sister-in-law Angie, never, ever make a promise to a woman that you can’t keep. If you say that you’re going to mow the lawn in the morning, make sure that you do it. It makes life easier.

So if the wife wants me to do something I’m not good at, I’ll just tell her. She married me, she knows what’s up.

8) Fixing something without having to call a service to do it: Read above.

9) Going out on couple dates where wives are best friends but the husbands have little or nothing in common: First, every guy has something in common with another guy. It can be sports, movies, tv shows, music, something.

I don’t think that spending time with others should be a way to get in with your wife. Just tell the wife that you don’t like doing couple dates and work on a compromise.

10) Not being a golfer. I’ve never played golf, so I’m not the best reference for this one.

It’s cool if you want to hit some balls once in a while, but my goodness, if you spend every waking moment trying to play golf instead of being with your wife, once again, reevaluate your situation.

It goes both ways, if you don’t abuse playing golf all the time and just want play a few holes once in a while, go ahead and do it. She has to be understanding of your hobbies. Balance.

11) Finishing all of the Sun Chips: This considered something that will get you less time watching football.

If you’re sharing some food with your wife, don’t take all of it. Even better, you can get some food for her and some for you. I like to eat and hopefully your wife does too. Nothing annoys me more than some girl that acts like she doesn’t want to eat. Have that burger when we’re on a date!

Those were the ones mentioned in the article, but let me finish with some final thoughts.

First, get frickin TIVO!

Second, a lot of these potential problems can be solved with two things.

1) Communicate with your girlfriend/future wife about some of this stuff before you get married and have kids. I’m going to work in sports for the rest of my life. It’s a grueling profession that takes your time and you make minimal to no money. It sucks for relationships, but all of my future girlfriends and maybe wife will know of this stuff at the beginning. I’ll lay it out for her so she’ll know what’s up.

I also like sports in my spare time. So, if I’m watching some crappy WAC football, she’ll know that its just part of my personality. Besides, I’ll TIVO the game, wait till she goes to sleep and watch the game alone, without commercials later.

2) Compromise. Sports are fun, but they shouldn’t be the most important thing in your life if you decide to get married and have kids. Please don’t let a most likely crappy football game weaken your bond with your family. Just catch the highlights on the NFL Network or ESPN.

Also, incorporate your wife/girlfriend into your sports. Don’t treat it like it’s a separatist event. I love explaining to women the rules of any game that I’m watching with her. Teach her some stuff and she may like the sports and become a fan. Then, you can watch the game with her, hence you get your sports fix and you spend time with her. Perfect.

However, if you’re hell bent on watching every single game with your buddies, then don’t get married or have kids.

I may never get married or have kids because of my sports career. It will be lonely, but I know that this is the life that I’ve potentially chosen and I’ve accepted it.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Here’s some clips from the Office, that’s what she said!

Sunday Reflections (Sunday Reflections Version)

Ok, final reflection for this Sunday night.

I had a good conversation with Rob, a good buddy of mine yesterday. He’s been out of town the past few months training and was back in Nashville. We were just talking about life and staying focused.

Of course the conversation turned to women, like it always does and both of us stated that we were not going to focus on women because we have major priorities coming up in our lives. He has his athletics and I have school and work.

I really want to dominate this year at Belmont and in the Nashville sports community. This will be my final year of school and I graduate in May. Until then, I want to continue making major inroads with all of the sports teams and organizations here, as well as continue to do a great job at Belmont. I really owe it to the athletic department, my co-workers, the coaches, student-athletes and myself to give a maximum effort.

I’ve lost focus on this, but it’s coming back.

It’s a trip because when I mentioned Tuesday before last that I wanted to talk about something personal: http://pourtoutpancakes.blogspot.com/2008/07/my-stray-cat.html. Of course it was about a girl, which is unfortunately typical at times for those of you who read this blog consistently.

It’s really bad, especially since she’s dating someone else and I really shouldn’t even be concerned about her in the least. She definitely isn’t concerned about me in a special romantic way. Anyway, I thought that she was mad at me and that we had a falling out.

Funny thing happened thought after that. I talked to a female friend named Watson and we discussed my situation with this girl from the very beginning and all of our interactions to get an objective opinion. After talking with Watson, I decided that I couldn’t let my emotions get entangled in someone that wasn’t available to me and would never date me.

Don’t get it twisted; I know that I’m a good guy who has many qualities. She’s a great girl too also. She just doesn’t like me in that way, which is fine. She obviously has an interest in another guy, is happy in that situation which makes me happy for her.

I was doing so good to not get emotionally attached to this girl, but it happened, I’m human. However, after our interaction that night and speaking with Watson, I was over it.

So I saw my lady friend earlier this week and we talked and interacted like we normally would. Much ado about nothing I guess on my end, but it was a good release for me. We’re cool now.

You can’t force something that isn’t there and I was talking myself into forcing myself into her life, if that makes sense. She doesn’t want me in her life in that way, but she has helped me on many levels.

I’ve actually improved my interaction with and learned more about women through speaking with her. She’s taught me how to become a better listener. She’s improved my eye contact because she has beautiful eyes to look at. She’s taught me to not just place women in structured categories because she crosses over many of them. She’s taught me that there are actually women out there who like sports the same way that I do and would potentially stay up and watch WAC football, mixed martial arts or West Coast Conference basketball with me. She restored my faith in the Midwest, even thought the baseball team she likes I can do without (just kidding if she reads this). She’s even taught me that curse words from a cute girl can actually be awesome.

Overall, she has shown me that there is a woman out there for me who will actually like me for me. I’ve been completely honest with her and acted like myself, no bullshit. The curse was for her. I could have never said that in my entire life until now.

Usually with women, I’m putting on a front and trying to act different. I can honestly tell you that I haven’t tried any lines with her or acted weird. I’ve been completely myself with her and its been great. This blog wouldn’t be as honest as it is and I wouldn’t have been able to deal with my true feelings of life if it wasn’t for her.

There’s a woman out there for me, it just isn’t her. I just have to continue to live my life and hopefully that special someone will emerge.

Speaking with Rob has brought these emotions full circle and I’m ready to emerge a better man.

This week, I’ll have posts on the following topics and others:

-Why if marriage is like this, why the hell get married? Here’s the article/story I’ll base my post on for a preview: http://deadspin.com/5025638/your-nfl-season-brownie-point-calculator

-Updated top-five women (I promise)

-Favorite Family Guy moments (I also promise this one)

-MMA Review on Friday

For now, here’s a cover of No Quarter by Tool that I was listening to while making this post. I also had some Massive Attack playing. Its always mellow music on Sunday nights for my Reflections. Have a good week!

Advice we can all use

Earlier this month on the great sports blog, Deadspin, there was an article written about a message to the graduates of the Class of 2008 in college. Here’s a link to the article for reference, it’s a good read: http://deadspin.com/5015813/a-special-balls-deep-message-to-the-class-of-2008

The article has some good points and the comments section also provided some good advice that can relate to life in general.

I know that I’m five years removed from graduating from college and I still can use as much knowledge as I can. So, I’m going to list all of the advice points/messages from the article and give my thoughts on them.

Graduation commencement speeches are pointless: I’ve detailed my memories of my college graduation in a past post here: http://pourtoutpancakes.blogspot.com/2008/05/my-graduation.html. At my school, we don’t have guest speakers. Instead our current Chancellor gives a message of hope. I really didn’t care too much for it and was just concerned with staying cool on a hot afternoon.

Watch all of the sports you can now: Luckily for me, I work in sports. I get paid to follow sports, to a certain degree. I have to know about the athletics of the school I work for and the conference, but everything else is just gravy. I’m not married, single and have no children, so I have a lot of free time to enjoy the ball game. However, you can get burnt out on sports. I like being the smartest sports person that I know, I mean that seriously. I haven’t met anyone that can touch me with knowing so much about every sport, even ones that I don’t care much for like golf. It’s a tough balance, but for now, I get my fill.

But to go into this point further, it seems like there’s this perception among men that once you get married, you have to give up all of your interests, sports included, and become a wimp who enjoys none of your hobbies anymore. If you’re a sports fan and your wife gets mad at you every time that you want to watch a ballgame or hang out with you buddies, reevaluate your wife situation. I’m not saying that you should hit the bars every night. Spend time with your wife. However, if she isn’t willing to allow you to follow your interests, that’s a problem. Also, get into her interests as well, make it balanced. If your wife gives you grief, that’s a shame on you moment, I’m just saying.

What, you got a job already: The point of this one is that you will move back home after you graduate college. I did and lived with family for three years before I moved out on my own. Take advantage of this opportunity as much as you can, because once you reach a certain age, you can’t live home again unless it’s an extreme circumstance.

On this same front, be prepared to have misunderstanding parents who don’t get your career. My mother will never understand why I’m in graduate school barely making money to live and taking loans out when I have a college degree from one of the best schools in the nation. She thinks that I should be making big bucks right now, but the reality is that in sports, it’s a grind to get to where you want to go. She even joked that when I graduate from grad school next year, I should be getting a salary around $40,000-$50,000. Maybe in two or three years. She doesn’t get it, but she loves me and supports me. Just be prepared for people to not get that you won’t make money when you first get out of school, which brings me to my next point…

Your first job will suck and you will not work for a cool company: My first job after college actually wasn’t bad. I was an intern for a fashion magazine and made no money. I learned a lot though. My first real job was working at a financial public relations firm in Atlanta about a year after I graduated. The pay was good and it helped me establish myself as an individual. In the end, I found my calling volunteering on the game day staff at Georgia Tech athletic events, which I didn’t get paid for at first.

I’ve lived in three different cities in three years. I’m technically a graduate assistant and get school paid for and get a stipend, which compared to other situations, is amazing. However, when your friends from college are making high five-figures and owning homes while you struggle in your small apartment and living check to check, it’s going to be rough. But if you find out what you like to do with your career, it will all work out in the end, you have to believe that.

Furthermore, work can’t be about money. Make sure that you’re fairly compensated for your work however. If your job pays you say $20,000 but you know that someone else will pay you more, treat you better and help your career more, take the new job. However, if you’re doing your work purely for money, your interest will end soon. You may make some cash and be good financially, but you will most likely be unhappy.

Don’t go to law school: If you want to be a lawyer, that’s cool. Just make sure that you are cut out for the lifestyle and actually want a legal career. I worked in the law school library of my school and people would be in school to do some other things then law. Why spend all of that money for three years? Go to business school. Its only two years, the skills you pick up translate to any profession and it’s more laid back. Or you can go to graduate school in your chosen profession field. Just make sure that’s what you want to do. I can’t do all of this stuff for sports management and decide to be a doctor. However, I want to work in sports, so it’s all good for me.

Live and work in New York City for a year: I totally agree with this. I’m biased because it’s my hometown, but it does make you a stronger person. Furthermore, the NYC allows you to see different cultures in action and makes you realize that you’re just one person among millions. It humbles you and that’s good for you.

Unless you work in the fashion industry, never wear a polo shirt with your company’s emblem in it: Me turn down free clothes, please. I work in a college athletic department. Our school’s logo is on everything, so this doesn’t apply to me.

In relation to this however, people tell you that you should dress for the job that you want. That’s true and not true. If you work in a corporate office where everyone wears a tie, wear a tie. However, if you work in a business casual office, don’t wear suits everyday. You may think that you’re dressing great, but believe it or not, a coworker or two will resent you inside because you look like you’re trying to prove that you’re above them. I know that sounds crazy, but I’ve been told this multiple times. If you like to wear suits in that type of environment, only do it a few times a week. On Fridays, wear a polo and some nice slacks and you will blend in with everybody.
For the ladies, be careful of what you wear, because men are men. If your skirt is too tight or high, we’re going to notice. If your blouse is too low cut that we can see cleavage, we’re going to talk about it. Even that male boss that you have who is married with kids and seems so respectful will talk about how you dress with the male co-workers because he’s a man. It happens.

Also, every place I’ve worked has always had a ranking of the cutest women in our office, bosses and married people included. It doesn’t mean that we’re going to act unprofessional and practice sexual harassment; it’s just that guys do that stuff. It stays between us and we move on.

So ladies, just be careful.

Never do your taxes by hand: I always do my taxes by hand and no problems there.

The only pick-up line you should ever use at any time is “Hi, my name is (whatever your name is, likely Tyler or Taylor or something like that).”: I agree with that. Just introduce yourself to someone that you’re interested in. If he or she just rejects you coldly, then screw that bitch or bastard.

If everyone else is dancing, you should dance too: I don’t like to dance at all. However, I think you can take from this statement that you should be open to things in life. If your co-workers are watching a ballgame at the bar even though you can’t tell the difference between a touchdown and home run, go anyway. If you’re talking with someone and they start discussing a topic you have no idea about, just ask them kindly to repeat what they said and explain it in more detail. You may learn something.

People are frickin idiots: The article uses another F word, but I try to keep it clean here. I don’t think that people are idiots per se, but that they aren’t as intelligent as you think. Never look at someone and say, wow, they’re so much smarter than me I don’t compare to them. Screw that attitude.

It also helps to be a little selfish and let people live in their own way. If someone wants to drink every night, do drugs, have sex with anything that moves and kick puppies, let them do it and don’t stick your nose in their lifestyle. If you don’t like gay people yet someone you know declares himself a homosexual, let them be. Not everyone has your beliefs in life and they shouldn’t either. Do you want to live a society where everyone shares the same opinion and beliefs as you do? That’s what cults and organized religion are for and neither one has the best history in society.

If a girl playfully punches you in a conversation, you can hook up with her: I don’t know if that’s totally true, even though I’ve heard that if she touches you, that’s a good sign. Just be careful with that one.

Don’t smoke Crack: Don’t do drugs in general. That leads to some bad stuff.

I’m not an angel and will tell you that I haven’t experimented in the past. However, just get that phase out of our system. As cool as it sounds to be a stoner when you’re 40, you’re still a stoner at 40. Let it go.

Here are things you should go name brand on:

-Cereal
-Oatmeal (most important one)
-Toilet paper
-Peanut Butter and Jelly

Be extra nice to the people who handle your food: I can’t say this clearer. They handle your food. They can mess up your night real fast, if you know what I mean. If your waiter is being rude, don’t act like an ass because they can do stuff to your food. Just be polite with your complaints.

Be nice to people who work in retail: I worked in retail for a year and it’s a thankless job. Also, be nice to the clerk when you’re returning an item, because that’s the biggest pain in the ass to do. Furthermore, try to return stuff where you got it from. It may seem easy to leave those socks in the pants section, but the clerk has to return that stuff and that’s extra work. If you don’t want to return it in the original section, drop it off at the front counter. Your future clerk will thank you.

Also, tip well; especially at places you go to often. It matters.

Avoid STD’s: If you’re inclined to have sexual activities, please protect yourself. It’s so simple. There are so many forms of protection, it’s not funny. Wear that condom, use that lube or cream, take that pill. Be safe out there, for real.

Don’t be married under 30: There’s no rush. If he/she is cool when you’re 25, they will be the same at 30 if that person is right for you. Marriage compromises you so much in relation to where you live, what job you have, how often you see family and friends. Why rush into that, because once you get married, you can look forward to 30-40 years of sitting in the house watching the news together.

Furthermore, communicate with your future wife/husband. Make sure that each of you shares the same opinion on things like home ownership, kids, sexual activity, education and everything else. If you want four kids and she wants none, that’s a problem. If you want to live in Seattle in five years while she wants to go to school in Miami, work that out. Go to therapy or marriage counseling BEFORE you get married.

Go home and get stoned at least once a quarter during lunch: I don’t condone drug usage so I can’t co-sign on that one.

I will say this, take advantage of your vacation time. I know that you want to impress your boss and work every hour possible and take no time off, but that will burn you out quickly. You will start to resent that job and perform poorly. If you finish work early on a day, just ask your boss if you can go home early. They will most likely say yes. Live your life and don’t get obsessed with work. You have to have balance.

Learn to say “screw it”: Things in your life are going to happen that are outside of your control. Just accept it and you will be a lot happier.

Learn the art of networking: Become friends with other people in your job industry in your city and nationally. Join organizations like PRSA for public relations people. They know about job openings before they’re published officially.

Also, network your friends. They may know of someone that you could date.

Never trust your bank balance online: Just keep track of your money and make sure that your checks clear before you start spending.

Never eat your roommate’s food: Its all about respect.

Don’t mix wine/liquor and beer: Amen to that. It’s a bad combination that you will pay for later in the night. Also, blacking out because you drank too much may seem cute when you’re at that keg party at name frat house here, but when you’re in your late 20’s that gets old. The reason is that your friends now have to drag/carry your drunken butt home and no one wants to be a babysitter to someone drunk when you’re out. Turn down that shot.

Get good car insurance, including AAA: When you’re broken down in the middle of the highway, you’ll be thankful you followed this advice.

Never tell someone that “I’ll make more money in a week then you will in a month:” That’s just an asshole thing to do, number one. Secondly, life is cyclical. You may be flying high right now, but something can happen in a second that brings you down.

Karma: Believe in that.

Don’t become good friends with your neighbor: Be respectful and open, but keep a distance.

Don’t crap where you eat or eat where you crap: I can never get this statement right. However, here are a group of people that you should never date if possible:

1) Coworkers
2) Neighbors
3) Student-Athletes (if you work in an athletic department)
4) Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend of a good friend of yours or sibling
5) Sibling of a good friend

That’s a partial list. I’m sure that I’m forgetting some

Buy good alcohol: You graduated college or are close to it. Enough with the Natty Light, cheap wine, Milwaukee Beast and others. However, don’t hate on box wine, that stuff is the truth.

Never trust a big butt and a smile: Bell Biv Devoe told us this, but there is some meaning to this. Be careful who you hook up with. Have fun, but just beware. Stay away from those dirty girls.

Go to your high school’s graduation five years after you graduated: I haven’t done this yet, but would like to.

Separate home and work: If you’re having problems at home, don’t bring that into work. Your co-workers will hate you. If you’re having problems at work, leave it at work. Your spouse, kids or roommates don’t want that crap.

Never go to bed hungry: My uncle Greg believes in this and I agree. I know that healthy people tell you not to eat before you go to sleep, but you don’t want to be lying there in your bed with your stomach grumbling. Have a banana or a bowl of oatmeal and call it a night.

Have one really good suit: Goes without explanation

Save your MP3 collection/old albums: I liked Limp Bizkit at a point in my life. I once bought an NSYNC album. Those weren’t good choices, even though I love Justin Timberlake now. However, I look at those music purchases and can think back to those times fondly.

Fly your freak flag with pride: I like soap operas, especially General Hospital. I cry over movies all the time. I like mixed martial arts. I love the Mars Volta and Minus the Bear even though I’m a big black guy from the NYC. I love Maury and court shows, especially People’s Court and Divorce Court. Don’t play the macho card and act all tough. Accept your diverse interests and if someone gives you shit about it, they suck.

Go to at least one music act in every music genre: Hit up a rap show if you’re a big alternative music fan. Go to a dive bar and see a punk rock show if you dig hip-hop. Hit up some classical music. See a jazz band. Diversify your musical taste and it will make you a better person.
Never date a woman with more than one cat: Pets are cool, but if she digs the cats more than you, move on.

Don’t get drunk at an office outing: I know that open bar looks enticing, but if you get drunk off your ass, you will be remembered as an ass and that’s not good.

If you have kids, be careful how often you mention them at work: Yes it’s cool that your son got his first base hit in little league or your daughter danced well at the recital, just don’t bore us with that info.

Learn a musical instrument: Even if you suck at it, like I do with bass, at least you’re trying. Don’t be a pussy and start playing Guitar Hero.

Don’t kiss up to your boss too much: Have some dignity.

Know the syndication TV schedule: When you’re having a rough day, there’s nothing better then watching an old Seinfeld, Scrubs, Simpsons, Family Guy, Everybody Loves Raymond, Two and a Half Men or Frasier episode to make you laugh and bring your spirits up. Find out when your favorite old show is on and you’ll have something to look forward to at night.

You have two ears and one mouth…you know the rest: It’s an old saying, but listen more than you speak. I have to work on this skill myself.

You’re only as young/old as you feel: Age is just a number used to determine if you can drive, get drunk, rent a car, enter a sports draft, be elected a politician or collect social security. Don’t let that shit determine what you do in life.

Don’t trust anybody: Sounds harsh, but you have to keep your guard up. By default, you will trust the people that need to be trusted and the ones you shouldn’t trust will be shut out because you didn’t trust them in the beginning. It works out.

Don’t take politics too seriously: We all agree that we have problems in our society, just different ways to solve them. Also, don’t label yourself a Democrat or Republican. Think for yourself and vote for whom you think is right for the job and not just based on the party that he or she is representing.

If you find a girlfriend/boyfriend who is willing to wake up early, pack your lunch, start a pot of coffee, and then go back to bed all while you shower, keep him/her at all costs: So true.

Some quick hitters before I go:

-If you can, spend a little extra and get your own place (I wish I could do this).

-Steal free wireless internet access.

-Ignore Boston sports fans.

-Don’t take your sports too seriously. Its cliché, but it’s just a game.

-Get a Costco membership.

-Learn how to cook. Eating out is expensive and the ladies like a man that can cook.

-Get involved with an older man/woman once in your life. You’ll learn something.

-Learn how to iron.

-Beware of moonshine or homemade beer. Worst drunken experience was in sophomore year of college when I didn’t do this.

-All women have dad issues and all men have mother issues. The sooner you realize that, the better.

-Have a professional e-mail address. You can still have a fun one, but when you start applying for jobs and you give your boss the one with goofy nickname@hotmail.com, not good.

-Learn how to swim.

-Watch your bathroom habits at work.

-Eat a good breakfast.

-Know a good lawyer, just in case.

-Don’t lie as much as possible. Telling the truth is much easier.

-Travel as much as you can. America is a great country, see it.

Finally, this is the most important one of all:

Just be decent to people.

Many of these advice items come down to one thing. Treat others as you would like to be treated. I know that some people are going to respond negatively and be an asshole to you. Don’t be a pussy and take someone treating you like crap. Stand up for yourself. However, if you’re good to people, good things will happen to you.

And I’m a nice guy, but I get screwed out of things at times. However, I can look at myself in the mirror and be happy with that guy. If you can do that in your life, well done. If not, there’s time.

I would love to hear your tips because this was the most fun post that I’ve ever written and I know I’ve missed some stuff.

For your viewing pleasure, here’s some Limp Bizkit. First concert I ever saw in Nashville was the Limp Bizkit/Method Man/Redman/System of a Down tour back in 1999 during freshman year. Ah, the memories.

See y’all around.