Music to listen to: Lila's Dance by The Mahavishnu Orchestra
So Valentine's Day was on Sunday and it was the first one in a few years that I was bitter that I was single. I think this is for several reasons.
First, I think that people, especially women are finally catching on to the overrated “holiday” and I use that term loosely. You shouldn't have to wait until February 14th to express your love to your girlfriend, it should be a daily event. Plus, I've said this since I've been a little kid, you should be insulted if your boyfriend treats you well on only one day of the year. So this has been an improvement. You're still going to have the few that take the day TOO seriously, but its ok.
Second, I really think that the economy has had a major effect on the “holiday.” People are struggling to pay bills and are literally losing their jobs, so the concept of spending thousands on a gift is a lot for us these days.
Third, on a direct personal level, I've gone through a complete reevaluation of my life and I'm not happy where I'm at professionally and personally, more the former than the latter. I'll get into that distinction at another time, but the point is that I've been more concerned about things like how I'm going to pay rent and what I want from my career in the next five years than worry about my dating situation.
Fourth, I've been single every single Valentine's Day in my life, literally. Even back in elementary school and junior high when you would just pick someone of the opposite sex and keep it moving, I never did that. I even broke down about it at 16 years old, will never forget it.
I was coming home on the subway and I saw at least five couples my age looking happy and exchanging gifts. Women were carrying flowers and candy, men were appreciating the affection and I was there staring at them, giving them the patented mean look. It was based on envy and when I got home, I started to cry because of my feeling of lonliness. I balled my eyes out for nearly an hour.
What does all of that mean? If the same thing happens for nearly 30 years on the same date in an annual basis, why get mad at it? I'm going to be single, most likely for the rest of my life, and I've accepted that. No need for tears.
Fifth, being single on this “holiday” saves money and I take pride in my thriftiness with my finances. You can call me cheap, I don't care.
Finally, the “holiday” does focus on love within dating relationships, but it does promote the concept of love in general and who can hate on that?
Before you can find happiness in your life, you have to appreciate the happiness that others are experienceing in their lives. Instead of having jealousy for people who are in loving relationships, I should acknowledge and approve of it. Love is hard to find and not all of us will feel it in our lives.
Plus, your time will come. It may not be soon and it may not be in the form that you expect. I may not come across a loving relationship with a girlfriend or wife until I'm 80 or I may meet her tomorrow, or even worse, maybe I've already experienced it and didn't understand it. Maybe my true love will be a dog I'll purchase next year. Either way, it will happen for me.
So, I wasn't bitter on Valentine's Day and it felt good.
First, I think that people, especially women are finally catching on to the overrated “holiday” and I use that term loosely. You shouldn't have to wait until February 14th to express your love to your girlfriend, it should be a daily event. Plus, I've said this since I've been a little kid, you should be insulted if your boyfriend treats you well on only one day of the year. So this has been an improvement. You're still going to have the few that take the day TOO seriously, but its ok.
Second, I really think that the economy has had a major effect on the “holiday.” People are struggling to pay bills and are literally losing their jobs, so the concept of spending thousands on a gift is a lot for us these days.
Third, on a direct personal level, I've gone through a complete reevaluation of my life and I'm not happy where I'm at professionally and personally, more the former than the latter. I'll get into that distinction at another time, but the point is that I've been more concerned about things like how I'm going to pay rent and what I want from my career in the next five years than worry about my dating situation.
Fourth, I've been single every single Valentine's Day in my life, literally. Even back in elementary school and junior high when you would just pick someone of the opposite sex and keep it moving, I never did that. I even broke down about it at 16 years old, will never forget it.
I was coming home on the subway and I saw at least five couples my age looking happy and exchanging gifts. Women were carrying flowers and candy, men were appreciating the affection and I was there staring at them, giving them the patented mean look. It was based on envy and when I got home, I started to cry because of my feeling of lonliness. I balled my eyes out for nearly an hour.
What does all of that mean? If the same thing happens for nearly 30 years on the same date in an annual basis, why get mad at it? I'm going to be single, most likely for the rest of my life, and I've accepted that. No need for tears.
Fifth, being single on this “holiday” saves money and I take pride in my thriftiness with my finances. You can call me cheap, I don't care.
Finally, the “holiday” does focus on love within dating relationships, but it does promote the concept of love in general and who can hate on that?
Before you can find happiness in your life, you have to appreciate the happiness that others are experienceing in their lives. Instead of having jealousy for people who are in loving relationships, I should acknowledge and approve of it. Love is hard to find and not all of us will feel it in our lives.
Plus, your time will come. It may not be soon and it may not be in the form that you expect. I may not come across a loving relationship with a girlfriend or wife until I'm 80 or I may meet her tomorrow, or even worse, maybe I've already experienced it and didn't understand it. Maybe my true love will be a dog I'll purchase next year. Either way, it will happen for me.
So, I wasn't bitter on Valentine's Day and it felt good.
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